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Grrrr. January 27, 2005


My phone's on the fritz at home, which means I have no internet, either. I'm not really sure how the TiVo's working, since I thought the capturing of programs worked over the phone, but I'm getting shows, thank goodness.

Called PacBell -- they said they'd be out between 1pm and 5pm yesterday, which meant I got up with little sleep, not enjoying the prospect of greeting the guy at the door wearing nothing but a robe. Of course, at 5:30 I called and they said, "Oh, he came by at 4:30! He noted that you weren't home and that your phone line is fine."

I was home, I was watching the front porch, and my phone line wasn't fine. Bah. "Can he come back out?"

A chipper, "Nope!"


"Sure, with a 1pm to 5pm window."

Cool. I always enjoy that when I go to bed at 8am.

This little, minor glitch got me all worked up and thinking about the carpet guy. Not even that much about the carpet guy, but about the fact that the owner never called me back, not once. I didn't want the guy prosecuted or fired, I just wanted an apology from the owner. Dude. So then I was lying in the bath getting ALL pissed off, wanting to take a deep breath and just let it GO, already, but I couldn't.

Do you ever have those fights in your mind? They're way worse when you're fighting in your head with a loved one -- I always fight the battle from every possible angle, finding the winning stance, and then getting more irate as I try to file what they could say next to what I will say when the moment arises. So that wasn't like this.

But I lay there, thinking of how I could get an audience with the owner. I could fake a delivery of balloons. I could call, saying I was the media. I could say I was the mayor giving him a commendation. Anything to get him on the phone, since he neither takes nor receives calls. Lying, however, I usually find is a bad idea, so I let go of those.

Lala told me simply to write yet another letter. She's right. I'm going to do that. Again. An apology for extremely unprofessional behavior is all I want. Or even a fight would be acceptable! I just hate being ignored.

But it ain't enough to get all (literally) hot under the collar like I did. I'm going to write another letter to the owner and hope he has some decency in him. Somewhere. And then I'll let it go again. If I don't do something, I'll end up lying in bed, unable to sleep, fantasizing about showing up at his work, with a couple of big ole mean ugly-looking cops (and I do know a bunch of them, believe you me) and see what he has to say THEN, huh? That's the part of me I don't like. So I'll write a note and let it go for another couple of months.

So if I'm offline for a while longer, please forgive me. I'm probably fighting with the phone company.

**Added later - While it would be nice to use police resources to track the owner down, it would also be illegal and I would never jeopardize my job like that. Really. But the internet? Now there's a tool I can use. I just found a two-week old craigslist want-ad with his personal email listed, along with his cell phone. Letter has been sent. Phone call to follow. Oh, that was a satisfying find.


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You're so clever. Good on you to send another letter. I totally understand how you feel. When you know you've been treated bad you want respect and being ignored is the worst thing the offender can do.

We're going through the same thing with our phone company. Things are better, but not once have those involved said sorry.

It does sound like the phone guy didn't even stop by, doesn't it. .. Good that you've written another letter. I truly hope you get an apology.

Oh - and on the Tivo. It downloads some days worth of TV listings over the phone line. You're fine without phone on that for a couple days.

And - I got a Shuffle :-)

It probably won't make you feel any better, but my best guess is that the guy isn't responding and apologizing in order to protect himself from litigation. I know in the case of dog bites, being a good person and offering to pay vet bills is seen in court as an admission of guilt and many people who thought they were being honorable have later gotten their butts sued off of them and because they apologised, they were penalized.
Now, I know you wouldn't press charges or sue the company if he apologized to you, and YOU know that, but he probably doesn't know that.
Just a thought.
Maybe he's lying in the tub thinking "I wish I could just tell that lovely woman that I'm sorry for my employee's terrible conduct...except my evil lawyer won't let me..."

Don't forget you can always hit him where it hurts.......the Better Business Bureau! I don't know what it takes to file a complaint through them, but it might be worth investigating if you hear nothing from him. And SO satisfying - nothing like the prospect of scaring off potential customers!

three words:


phone guy sounds like a liar to me. pants burning i'm sure.

as for the carpet guy. go get 'em. i'm sick of these "guys" trying to get away with shit. fuckers.

When you send that kind of letter, copy the Better Business Bureau, any local ombudsman (sometimes the newspapers have someone like that), and any professional associations he might belong to. You have to be careful not to slander him (tell lies) but it helps in getting a response and it makes the letter more satisfying.
P.S. Of course, you need to put CC:_____ at the bottom so he knows you've done it.

You go girl! And I agree with the BBB and the cc on the email. Put the fear of God (or Rachael!) in him.

When the cable guy doesn't show up, they're supposed to leave a note/hangtag saying that they attempted to come by but you weren't there. I found this out because I had the same thing happen with them, and when I called to ask why he'd missed his window, the girl on the phone first told me he'd been there, and then asked if he'd left anything, and I told her he hadn't. And I'm like you, I'd been 10 feet from the door the whole time, hadn't even gone to the bathroom.

I definitely have those fights in my mind. :P

When you are back on line check this out. (The Pressure video)

Music and dancing are a great way to deal with those darned head fights.
I've been loading up a green miniiPod with old and new songs from iTunes. I think I have you to blame for sending me to the Apple Store. I saw the Shuffle and it looked like too much of a toy.

Yay Craigslist! That is a terrific find!

How on earth do you knit so many gorgeous sweaters? I have been knitting for decades and it still takes ages to crank out a pair of socks. Your sweaters are just beautiful. Lily

oooo! I love rightous indignation! Please let us know what happens.

And Thanks!! btw - for your very cool comments a while ago about my book. It's just a huge relief to have *finally* finished.

Ok, I had to go back and refresh myself on the whole carpet guy thing. And it made me so mad and upset ALL OVER AGAIN I want to come out there and like, beat the guy up when he's at his chemo appointment. Chemo appointment my flabby ass! And BBB doesn't hit him where it hurts if he clearly has complaints against him already. Come on, people! This is the real world! I say follow up on the police complaint you've already filed and say this guy never even contacted you back, and you want a statement from the business owner, and you've tried several times on your own to get one and he hasn't had the courtesy to give you one without third party mediation. If you find a nice enough cop they might pester him enough to contact you back. It's been known to happen.

Oh yeah, I have those kinds of arguments in my head. I get v. worked up, decide on the perfect thing to say (usually something v. nasty and v. mean) and when finally afforded the opportunity to say that v. mean and v. nasty thing, I croak "Um, I'm really sorry, but you hurt my feelings, and, um, I'm sorry". Bah.

I think the letter, followed by a phone call, and then a report to the BBB sound like a great plan.

Hey- The cops in Alameda are NOT ugly- we have really cute cops here! Whenever they're at the park, (and not busy) they always say hi to my kids, hand out stickers, and smile. Big, maybe, but not ugly.

I feel your pain about waking up in the middle of your sleep to wait for the none existant phone guy. I ask people if they would like me to wake them up at 3am and expect to function.
I wear sweats so I don't have to answer the door in my bathrobe. Of course having teenagers does help when you need to have someone answer the door. So why does the doorbell ring when on one else is home?
Good Luck with the carpet guy.

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